What happened...

And just like that its all over...

All the shopping, cooking, baking, cleaning, wrapping, decorating...and its over in a day.

Almost like nothing happened.

I did get to enjoy spending time with my kids, having them both home was so nice..but also too short.

We went to visit Mom on Christmas Eve.  She complained about things for the majority of the time rather than actually spending time with us.  She asked my Navy son about what he has been up to but while he was answering she was paying more attention to her food than his answers. 

That part bothered me most of all.  He doesn't know what a negative nelly she is or how depressing she can be, he doesn't see her much.  He was excited to see her.  She clearly didn't feel the same.  She was more excited about the gifts we brought her rather than our company...like a 5 year old. 

Once again, it is what it is...

We visited some wineries with the Navy son while he was home...he loved it.  We bought ALOT of wine...and drank most if it.  Needless to say there are conversations that I am learning about that were had on Christmas Eve that I don't remember.

That's happened a few times over the past few months.  I'm not going to lie...that scares me.  I need to reign that back in. 

The past two months I feel have been super stressful.  I'm not handling it well at all.  I need to get back to the gym.  As simple as that sounds that will completely help me.  I'm better when I'm busy...but busy in a positive healthy way.  Make sense?

So this post seems like a whole lot of complaining and nothing.  If you have read any of this and made it this far...thanks I guess.

Goals for 2019...better blog content and more gym time!

Can I skip Christmas?

Well the last week or so has been completely overwhelming (some good...some bad)...and I'm not handling it well.

First the good..my youngest son who was stationed overseas is home for Christmas.  He leaves the day after but I will take what I can get.  He is also spending most of his time with his friends and brother (who lives an hour away from me) so I won't get to see him much but again I will take what I can get.

There have been some changes at work.  New hires...new manager.  None of this is necessarily bad...just different and something I need to adjust and get used to. 

Also work has slowed down and I don't do well with to much time on my hands. 

My Mom received some bad news last week and had to have emergency surgery.  Which happened yesterday.  She is ok...but now there is the recovery. 

She had breast cancer in 2001.  It came back 5 years ago as lesions (everywhere).  For the most part she has been ok with the help of medication however its not working as well as it has been and a tumor formed. 

She is 80 years old.  Over the last 5 years it's been one thing after another.  I worry...

Now with her being in the hospital, I'm unclear as to our next step.  She had this same surgery before on her right side and had to go to physical rehab afterwards for short term care.  I'm assuming the same will happen now but her doctor is saying "we'll see"  WHAT DOES THAT MEAN! 

Christmas is next week.  I'm not ready.  There are still gifts to be wrapped, cookies to be baked, food to be purchased and prepped.  I can't get a definite answer from my kids when then are coming and now I need to figure out when/where to visit my Mom.

Like I said...I'm overwhelmed.