New Drama

I'm married!  Got married on Friday!  That's not the drama.  Just wanted to start this post off happy...something positive.

Now onto the drama

My mom is in a physical rehab facility.  THEY SUCK!
The physical rehab part is fine.  But the nursing staff is horrible.

My mom currently has an infection in her right leg.  Her left arm is red and itchy and its traveling to her breast.  The doctors/nurses don't seem to feel there is anything urgent.

My mother mental health is declining. She sounds incredibly depressed every time I talk to her.

I email and yell at the administrators of this facility all the time.  Demanding better care.

I literally have no idea what else to do. 

This is stressful and overwhelming. 

I really just want to get her out of there but then I don't know how I would care of her. 
UUUGGHHH

Any suggestions? 

Emotions

I have been an emotional person for a long time. 

By emotional, I'm the one that cries when reading birthday cards, at movies, listening to music, the drop of a hat....you know..the regular stuff.

I haven't always been emotional.  I was married before and I didn't cry during the ceremony (I am getting RE-MARRIED this Friday!) or anytime even after the ceremony.  I've cried at other peoples weddings, just not the ones I've been in so far.  I've had two children...didn't cry after giving birth to them. 

This wedding is going to be different.   First of all...I cry at everything so I feel its inevitable.  Second, this is literally the love of my life, we have been together 14 years on the 11th.  Our local Mayor is preforming the ceremony..it will be very small...just us but I guarantee there will be tears.  Happy tears. 

Having said that....my emotional state has kinda become a family joke.  (which is another reason why I'm kinda glad we aren't have people at this wedding).  Anytime anything mushy happens everyone stops and looks at me...at which point I am usually tearing up.  Then they all laugh.  It was funny in the beginning but I don't find it funny anymore. 

I'm getting up there in age and menopause is probably right around the corner so that might play a factor in my increased emotional state.  But its annoying.  Sometimes I find myself having a conversation with a co-worker about NOTHING IMPORTANT and suddenly have to stop and compose myself.  Its embarrassing. 

I almost wish there was a pill to take to turn it off.  Although I probably wouldn't take it anyway.

I have no idea where this comes from...my mother was never emotional.  The only time I've seen her cry is if she isn't getting her way (I kid you NOT).  My father passed away, I couldn't stop crying...I don't remember her crying at all.  She sold a house she lived in for 20 years..no tears, I cried.  I've seen her at funerals, weddings, meeting her grandchildren...nothing. Sometimes I think she might be emotionally void.  Even then...wouldn't something invoke a tear? 

I cry to much...I'm to emotional.  I want it to stop.

We have been re-watching the Vampire Diaries (guilty pleasure...I LOVE VAMPIRES..hehehe)
In this show, the vampires can flip an internal switch and turn off their emotions...all of them at the same time.  I want to learn how to do that....

Do you think that's a thing?  LOL